One of the things that has been hardest for me as I've started exploring the kinkier side of life, is how to successfully keep my kink life away from my child, and still have a kink life. I belong to an amazing community of people in my mid-sized Midwest town, but very few of them have children, and even fewer of the regularly active members are single parents. I of course, am one of the latter.
The immediate problems were how do I even meet people and learn about this without exposing m child; the internet solved that problem for me. Some of the sites I found were pretty skeezy, no doubt about that, but a few of them were pretty decent.
Then I found Fetlife. *insert angels singing and rays of light shining down*
It took me a long time to get brave enough to even explore this, it was one thing to tell a boyfriend to "do me harder!" in bed, and a completely different thing to say to the e-world, "Here I am! I'm submissive and I like pain!". To me that just screamed that I wanted creepy old men to proposition me for sex, or more likely, I would end up locked in someones basement for months and told to put the lotion on my skin or else I would get the hose again. Neither of those were scenarios I was looking forward too, so I made a profile and began to lurk. And lurk. And lurk some more. I lurked for over a year, hiding my lurking from people on the site, people in my real life, and even my then boyfriend.
Finally someone emailed me (I had gotten the propositions for sex from creepers the whole time, but I chose to ignore those) and actually told me something about herself, told me she was a mom too, and welcomed me to talk to her about all my fears and concerns. So I did. Then I posted in some local groups, and finally started meeting people.
Game on.
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